When I was younger, fantasising about my wedding, also involved fantasising about being a bridesmaid to my older sister and later in life, to my best friend. To me, it is almost as exciting as getting married yourself. I had the privilege of standing next to my best friend on her wedding day in September and I like to think that I had a pretty integral part to play in her big day.
All the fantasising and planning; however, did not prepare me for the big day! The morning of the wedding, I was hit with a wave of anxiety which I simply had not anticipated. Only then did it occurred to me, being a Bridesmaid is actually a pretty big deal. A lot of focus is put on the Bride & Groom’s emotions (for obvious and correct reasons) but my experience showed me how unprepared I was for my own emotions as a bridesmaid.
So, my plan is to interview as many Bridesmaids as I can to get the inside scoop for all the ladies out there. Is it a very emotional experience for everyone, or am I just a sappy mess (highly likely)? – read on to find out!
It’s Question Time
Q.1. Were you expecting to be a bridesmaid?
Q.2. Would you have been disappointed if you were not asked to be a bridesmaid?
Yes, but I would never openly admit it
Q.3. Were you friends with or close to the other members of the bridal party?
Yes, we were a close-knit group of friends.
Q.4. On a scale of one to ten, how happy and constructive was the general group dynamic?
Negative & Hard Work 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Happy & Constructive
Q.5. Based on your experience as a Bridesmaid, what piece of advice would you give a Bride to Be?
Your bridesmaids are there to be your support in your planning and on your big day. Tell the bridesmaids exactly what you want and expect to avoid disappointment.
Q.6. Was this the first wedding you had a role in?
Q.7. Were you married at the time of this wedding?
Q.8. If you were not married at the time you were a bridesmaid, would you choose to have bridesmaids at your future wedding, based on your experience?
Yes of course!
Q.8.1 Please tell us why?
Having your closest friends with you during the planning and on the big day must definitely take a lot of stress off of the bride to be. It must also be a lot of fun.
Q.9. Would you actually have preferred to simply be a guest at the wedding?
No, I wouldn’t have been sad but I definitely enjoyed being a special part of the day.
Q.10. Would you consider being a bridesmaid again?
Q.11. Did you feel like you had a choice in the matter or was it simply assumed you would be a bridesmaid?
Yes, I had a choice.
Q.12. What advice do you have for future Groom’s, based on your experience?
If the bridesmaids ask for advise/suggestions when they are planning the bridal shower, give it to them. The groom knows the bride to be the best and will know what the bride really wants and enjoys.
Q.13. What was your pet peeve during the planning process?
Not being able to get together with the bridesmaids regularly.
Q.14. What did you love about being a bridesmaid?
Standing in the front and seeing my friend come down the aisle with the biggest smile on her face.
Q.15. What surprised you the most during the planning process or on the day of the wedding?
The bridesmaids received thank you gifts on the day and this was a nice surprise.
Q.16. Did you feel resentful for the financial obligation involved in being a bridesmaid?
No, I knew what I was in for.
Q.17. On a scale of one to ten, how time-consuming was it being a bridesmaid?
Super chilled 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 Crazy busy – I had no personal life outside of the wedding for months
Q.18. Did you feel as if this experience strengthened the bond with your friend/family member or did damage your relationship?
We are no longer on speaking terms 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 We are closer than ever!
Q.19.1 Did you ever feel overwhelmed during the process?
No, it was pretty smooth sailing.
Q.19.2 Please tell us a bit more…
Our bride was very chilled and she was not demanding at all.
Q.20. Finally, what advice would you give future bridesmaids out there?
If you are unsure about something, ask the bride to be. At least then you will know what the bride wants or expects. You should include all the bridesmaids during any planning. If possible, divide the tasks and give the other bridesmaids tasks that they are the best at. You should send out “save the dates” for the bridal shower about 4 months in advance.
I hope that this interview has given some useful insight to those preparing to either walk down the aisle themselves, or stand by their friend’s side!