For those that know me know that my Mom is absolutely wonderful. I’ve always thought that she is a true example of the perfect Mother. She is fiercely protective and completely selfless. She has never, not once, in my entire life put herself before me. That’s 28 years of pure selflessness. She has always gone above and beyond the call of duty for me and planning our wedding was no exception.
I think her only fault is that she doesn’t always tell you her true feelings if she thinks they will hurt yours. Her go-to comment is that something is ‘that’s different’, instead of admitting she doesn’t like it. We rarely fight and generally see eye to eye on everything. So I can quite honestly say that the most surprising part of planning my wedding was when my Mother called me a Bridezilla. The day before my wedding, no less.
It’s fair to say that I was shook. To be honest, I think she was too. “What is happening?!” I thought. This was not the way I was used to my Mom reacting to my ~sometimes~ high expectations. It was all over something completely insignificant and surprisingly enough, did not impact me on the big day at all.
So, here is the story:
I had arranged to have my nails done with my bridesmaids and Mom the evening before the wedding. I booked the appointment a couple of months in advance and emailed everyone with the details and told them that they need to arrive with bare nails.
Pretty straightforward, I thought. All they had to do was show-up.
Fast forward to the day before the wedding. My parents and sister and I had a lovely ‘last breakfast’ and my Mom and I had gone on to do some last minute shopping. All of which had gone incredibly well without any concerns. We had actually commented on how successful our shopping had been. Everything was ticking along nicely and going according to plan (Narrator of my life “it was not going to plan”). We arrived home in the early afternoon, I was expecting the bridesmaids in a few hours as we were all leaving for the salon together.
That is when things started to go awry.
I began packing up all of the items we needed to take with us to the venue and after some time it occurred to me that I was doing it all alone. A little frustrated that I was not lounging and relaxing before my big day, I went in search of my Mom.
She was frantically trying to get Gelish nail polish off of her toenails!
Mere hours before our appointment. We had so much else to do and I could not believe that she had left this so late. I needed her help packing and to be completely honest, I wanted to have all of her attention. I did not want her faffing about with her nails. Here is some actual* footage of my reaction:
I could tell she had been struggling for some time, she looked a bit frazzled and worried. (In hindsight it was probably complete and utter fear of me)!
Frustrated, I quizzed her about the fact that she should have sorted this out days, nay, weeks earlier! I gave her plenty of notice. It then came out that my dear sister and Maid of Honour was frantically trying to remove her’s too. Hiding out at her boyfriend’s house. This led to a hysterical and emotional exchange with my Mom and to her ultimate dropping of the B-Bomb!
In the end, she managed to make an emergency soak-off appointment at the salon down the road. I think my sister went to more extreme measures but showed up with clean nails and the good sense not to mention it. We put the incident behind us and had a lovely salon appointment and dinner that evening.
Hindsight is 20/20 – Especially with Weddings
On reflection, it was so silly. On both our parts. Yes, she should have sorted her nails in advance but I completely overreacted. I can only put this down to a simple outburst of emotion. It was less than 24 hours before my wedding, her youngest daughters big day! I think both my Mom and I were entitled to our overreactions and I am grateful that we both managed to brush ourselves off and move on.
I know how blessed I am to have such a great relationship with my Mom and I realise that if we didn’t, that incident had the potential to cause some serious wedding drama. On the big day itself, it did not even cross my mind and I truly hope it didn’t cross my moms either. Luckily, I have some pictures to prove it!
I now see how easy it is for families to have seemingly unnecessary arguments in the days and weeks leading up to the big day. It’s important to realise that a wedding is an emotional event. A life-changing event. It is natural for the Bride and Groom and their close family members to experience some unusual stress and possibly overreact. Or, react in a way they usually wouldn’t.
I truly believe that this is unavoidable for any wedding. What you can do though is be prepared for it and not allow it to overshadow your big day. Give your parents or your siblings a break, even if one, or both of you overreact to something silly. Take deep breaths people and remember the big picture and why you are getting married in the first place. If you do that, everything else will fall into place.
Finally, all that’s left for me to say is…I love you, Mom!